I went to the see the Pre-Nursing Advisor at FIU to find out why exactly I was not accepted into the BSN program. Long story short, it all came down to the C I got in Survey of Chemistry this past Spring semester. Yes, it did come down to that one grade, probably because the class was worth 4 credits. Had I gotten a B, I quite very likely would have made it into the program.

This makes me feel horrible. Honestly, it makes me feel this close to hating myself. I struggled with that class so much. Did I do the utmost best I could have? No, probably not. But I did do my best. It just wasn’t enough to get that extra points to a B. And I’m now paying for it.

I need to step away from this issue for a short time, a day or two; maybe the weekend. I need to not think about this, need to stop blaming myself for that C.

There are still a number of programs out there, a couple affordable, most private and expensive, but I cannot, will not let all the work I have done, all the hours studying, all the miles driven around town, all the personal situations this new path brought into our lives to be for nothing.

But not today.